What’s Your Houseplant Personality?
Everyone can be a plant parent, you just have to find the best plant for you
Navigating the world of houseplants can be pretty confusing, especially for the plant newbie. The innumerable species, varieties, and styles to choose from can be overwhelming. And while aesthetic may initially drive your plant choice, what looks like the prettiest plant to you, may not exactly work with your space, your lifestyle, or even your habits.
Take this quiz to figure out what plant works best with your personality, and take small steps toward plant parenthood.
1. It’s Monday morning and you need a cup of coffee to fuel you through a busy morning at work. What’s your kuppa of choice?
A. Brewed coffee, done in your own French Press at home—exactly the way you’ve been making your coffee for years now.
B. A shot of espresso. You like to drink it straight up, no frills.
C. A glass of the cold brew you’ve been working on all through the weekend. Perfection.
D. A latte from that out-of-the-way coffee shop you like so much. Your Monday deserves an extra zing, even if it means clocking in late just because you made a detour.
E. No coffee, just a hot cup of water with a squeeze of lemon, just the way your grandmother taught you. You’ve got to take care of your digestion, after all!
2. There’s nothing like a Netflix binge to beat the stress. What are you queuing up on your viewing list?
A. As many “Friends” episode as you can possibly watch. You can always rely on classic Rachel, Joey, Monica, Ross, Chandler and Phoebe shenanigans to put you in a good mood.
B. The first thing on your Netflix Recommendations list. You’re too tired to get through all your paperwork, much less pick a movie to stream.
C. All the rom-coms you can possibly find. They’re the perfect balm for exhaustion and overexertion. Bring on the popcorn!
D. That true crime documentary you’ve been waiting forever to watch. You may not get everything done at work, but at least you can see a murder case resolved on TV.
E. Anything sci-fi, fantasy, or out of this world. You need an escape—stat.
3. Just in case you actually do win the lotto this week, what’s your dream sky’s-the-limit vacation?
A. All your regular outposts, but done, five-star style. Goodbye, hostels, fast food, and economy class!
B. Whatever your family decides. You’ll be happy as long as you’re outta here.
C. A full-on glamping experience through the African safari. You’re seeing the Sahara in absolute luxury.
D. A literal around the world trip. You’re hitting all the continents, all the cities, all the tourist sites, no matter how long it takes you to get through all of it.
E. A wonders of the world tour. You’ll be making your way up the Mountain Province and seeing Banawe the way it’s meant to be seen; traveling to the Taj Mahal; and gazing up at the pyramids of Giza.
4. What’s your current job like?
A. Just your plain old 9 to 5, although sometimes it feels more like a 7 to 10 kind of gig.
B. What job? I’m out of work at the moment.
C. I’m a creative entrepreneur, building my own business, working off my laptop at coffee shops most days.
D. I’m on top of my game in an extremely competitive field. I get off excelling at my career.
E. I work with the family and have been doing this since I started interning every summer when I was in high school. I know our business inside out.
5. My outfits on the regular look like…
A. A generic top (I have the same kind in five different colors) mixed and matched with the same cut pants, which I also own in all lengths, colors, and fabrics.
B. The first thing I pull out of my closet. Sometimes, it’s a win and everything goes together. Other times, I look like a crazy person and that’s okay.
C. Something borne out of an Instagram influencer’s closet. I love putting together looks—it makes me happy.
D. Anything sharp, slick and clean. If I can look like one of the lawyers on “Suits,” then I know I’ll have done my job well.
E. Whatever the weather calls for. I dress according to the seasons.
6. My preferred social media platform is…
A. Facebook. Everyone’s on it, therefore it’s the most convenient.
B. No social media for me, thank you very much.
C. Instagram. I only like to look at photos that make me happy.
D. Twitter. It’s where the news cycle never ends, and I can pick up on some guilty pleasure snark too.
E. Does email count as social media?
7. It’s time to beat the inevitable bloat the holiday season will surely be ushering in. What’s your workout choice?
A. An hour at the gym before heading to work, or after a busy day if I didn’t make it in the morning. Thrice a week weight training, thrice a week cardio, done and done.
B. Who cares about the holiday bloat?
C. Yoga and meditation. My peace of mind needs a workout too.
D. Crossfit weekends, spinning weekdays, and flexibility training when everything gets too tight.
E. Tai chi, Qi gong, and yin yoga. All the good stuff.
8. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?
A. Shower. I need it to wake myself up.
B. Hit the snooze button a couple more times.
C. Breakfast, preferably in bed.
D. Read the news so I’m briefed before I head out the door.
E. Pray, journal and/or meditate.
9. You’re finally getting around to setting up a home office. What do you put above your desk?
A. A bulletin with a calendar, of course.
B. I’ll figure it out when I have the time.
C. A beautiful art print.
D. A motivational quote.
E. My vision board.
Tally your answers and read up on the plant that matches you.
Mostly As: Hanging Plant
Air plants add dimension to a room as they play on different heights, giving your eye some greens at different levels. These plants thrive on consistency and routine, making them perfect for those who love to stick to a regular schedule. Pencil in mist and spray time into your calendar so you’re sure your plants stay healthy and happy all year round.
Mostly Bs: ZZ Plant
This low maintenance plant is a favorite among those who are still working they way toward developing a green thumb. Able to survive even when left alone for stretches of time, these hardy plants infuse your interiors with greenery and nature without requiring your attention 24/7. If your lifestyle has you busy all the time, or if you’re mostly a free spirit who doesn’t have the mind space to take care of another living creature, this one’s for you.
Mostly Cs: Fiddle Leaf Fig
One of the plants that boomed as soon as the indoor plant trend hit the mainstream, the Fiddle Leaf Fig needs your constant attention. A plant that thrives with a lot of pampering, it is quite sensitive to its environment and needs you to see how it’s adapting to your surroundings. If you’ve got a fine eye for detail and love showering attention on others, the Fiddle Leaf Fig will figure perfectly in your home.
Mostly Ds: Succulents
These pretty desert blooms can be quite the challenge to deal with, especially in our climate. Only the most meticulous plant parents can tackle the demands of cacti or succulents. These sometimes-prickly plants can be quite the challenge. And those with a mean competitive streak will most likely beat them at their own game, figuring out exactly how to make them thrive.
Mostly Es: Fortune Plant
If you’re a stickler to Feng Shui or any other superstitious home decorating beliefs, the Fortune Plant is a perfect “good energy” addition to your home. Said to bring good luck to wherever they’re planted, you can put it in your bedroom for a better relationship with your partner or in your home office for fortune to roll in in your career sector.
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